ERWA

Writing Exercise – Limericks

September 26, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

As some of you may be aware, I’m currently compiling an anthology of poetry, Coming Together: In Verse. The call for submissions is listed here: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

For those of you wanting to submit, but lacking inspiration or ideas, below you’ll find one of the poetry writing exercises I’ve previously shared on the blog for the Erotic Readers and Writers Association (http://erotica-readers.blogspot.co.uk). I’m going to try and share them here on a weekly basis until we reach the deadline date.

A silly young woman called Alice
Used live dynamite for a phallus
It blew her vagina
To North Carolina
And her ass to a ranch up in Dallas

I’ve mentioned limericks before but I’m mentioning them again as a writing exercise for one very important reason: they’re fun.

Note the rhyme scheme: a-a-b-b-a. This is consistent for the majority of limericks.

A very good friend of mine, Paul
Has got a hexagonal ball
The result of its weight
Plus his dick’s length times eight
Is his phone number: give him a call

Note the metre/syllable count. In this one it’s 8/8/6/6/9. Commonly, each limerick is 8/8/5/5/8 although they can go a couple of syllables either side depending on how they’re being performed.

Please remember that the most important thing about the limerick is that the form lends itself to fun.

One morning a nobleman, Andy
Woke up feeling properly randy.
He said to his aide,
“Please fetch in my maid,
Or the dog, or whatever is handy.”

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – Standart Habbie

September 19, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

When it comes to raw sex appeal, it’s difficult to think of a country sexier than Scotland. Famous for muscular males, proficient in caber tossing and kilt-wearing; equally famed for feisty flame-haired females, Scotland has been the home of raunchy romance since the earliest days of print.

Scotland is also blessed with a proud poetic heritage which gives us this month’s writing exercise. The Burns stanza is named after Scotland’s national poet Robert Burns.

The form did exist before Burns made it his own in the form of the Standart Habbie. It’s also known as the Scottish stanza or, sometimes, simply the six-line stave. Personally, I’m happy calling it a Burns stanza. This is my attempt at the form.

Wee, sleekit, cowran, tim’rous lassie,
Blessed with a perfect, peach-shaped assie
Your heels and stockings look so classy,
Have a guess what’s on my mind
You know I’d love to mount your chassis
And take you rudely from behind.

Stanzas have six lines rhyming aaabab.

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – Shadorma

September 12, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

The shadorma is something of an enigma. Authorities are unsure about its ancestry. Is it an overlooked Spanish form that has been around for ages? Or is it a relatively new innovation that has been brought to us in the guise of something with a history?

These questions won’t be answered here. This is partly because I’m not clever enough to know how to respond but mainly, because I don’t care one way or the other. Whether it’s ancient or modern, the shadorma is a fun poetic form that’s worth the time and effort of any writer wanting to stretch literary muscles with a brief warmup exercise. To my mind, this is the only detail worth considering with regards to any poetic form.

I don’t want
your lace-topped stockings
black thong or
fuck-me shoes.
I just want you without your
designer labels.

The shadorma is a six lines stanza made up of lines that contain 3-5-3-3-7-5 syllables respectively. There is no fixed rhyme scheme. A shadorma can consist of a single stanza, or the form can be used to produce a longer poem with multiple stanzas.

Sad to say

despite best efforts

(replacing

batteries

shaking it ‘til it wobbles)

the rabbit is dead.

Take comfort
or consolation
from this fact:
that rabbit
died doing what he loved best.
His last words were, “buzz.”

The shadorma can be a lot of fun and, as with all poetic forms, it’s a great way to discipline your writing muscles. The majority of online material discussing this form reiterates the need for six unrhymed lines in the format of 3-5-3-3-7-5 syllables.

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – the rispetto

September 5, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

This is what the Encyclopaedia Britannica has to say about the Rispetto:

rispetto, ( Italian:: “respect,” ) plural rispetti, a Tuscan folk verse form, a version of strambotto. The rispetto lyric is generally composed of eight hendecasyllabic (11-syllable) lines. In its earliest form the rhyme scheme was usually abababcc. Later, the scheme ababccdd became more prominent, and other variations can also be found.

Here’s an interpretation of the second cited form of the rispetto that was written for me by an anonymous colleague.

Won’t you tie me to the bed before we start?
At least secure my wrists so I’m held rigid.
You may take my body like you took my heart
I’m motionless and cool but far from frigid.

I’ll surrender to your absolute control
Let me languish in my loved submissive role
Make each punishment seem painful and unjust
I’ll be bound and tied: a prisoner to your lust.

There are other versions of the rispetto. There are heroic interpretations when written in iambic pentameter. I’ve even seen versions written in tetrameter. The key things to remember for this form are:

1) Regardless of which meter or rhyme scheme you select, retain the strict meter.

2) Have fun.

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – canzonetta

August 29, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

The canzonetta is a lyric poem. It contains varying line lengths, varying metrical patterns and a refrain.

A typical canzonetta consists of at least two octaves. Each octave should use a series of alternating couplets and the last line or phrase of a stanza is repeated in each subsequent stanzas.

The rhyme scheme is:

a b a b c d c D

a b a b c b c B

Note that the capital letter indicates a repeated line. Does this sound complicated? Would it be better illustrated with an example?

I think it’s time we played a game
A game you’ll know from way back when
Get naked and embrace the shame
Although you’re in the lion’s den
You’ll touch your toes, spread both your cheeks
Conclude your prayer and say, “Amen.”
In my domain no other speaks
So close your eyes and count to ten

You hold your breath and worry hard
Because it’s time to play again
You fear your backside might get scarred
As once perhaps it did back then
You wonder what’s about to come
A sigh of leather and you ken
The pain is aimed right for your bum
So close your eyes and count to ten

You’ll notice here that I’ve gone for the a b a b c b c B rhyme scheme. My refrain, ‘So close your eyes and count to ten’ will continue to work through this poem if I go on to develop it into further stanzas.

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – Tankas and Somonkas

August 15, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

Since we started looking at poetry as a writing exercise we’ve considered various syllable forms. The most famous of these is the haiku, usually interpreted in Western writing as three lines containing 5-7-5 syllables.

As I’ve said before, I enjoy the discipline of syllable forms because it forces us to approach words from a different angle. We’re counting syllables as well as considering the perceived denotations and connotations of potential synonyms.

There are other variations on this syllable-counting theme. One of the more popular is the tanka.

The tanka is similar to the haiku except it’s longer in that it’s usually five lines and interpreted as 5-7-5-7-7 syllables. Given that it’s almost double the length of the haiku, the tanka can still be surprisingly restrictive.

However, this month’s form is not the 5-7-5-7-7 syllable tanka. This month we’re looking at the somonka.

The somonka is made up of two tanka-sized stanzas presented as an exchange of love letters.

Note to my master
I come to you on my knees
Ready and willing
My bare flesh is yours tonight
Do with me as you see fit

To my submissive
Thank you for your love letter
It was not needed
Your bare flesh is mine tonight
But only if I want it

Does that look simple enough? Two tank-sized stanzas (5-7-5-7-7 syllables) presented as an exchange of love letters.

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – little willies

August 8, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

In the drinking-well
(Which the plumber built her)
Aunt Eliza fell,
We must buy a filter.

Col D Streamer,
Ruthless Rhymes for Heartless Homes

The original Ruthless Rhymes (Ruthless Rhymes for Heartless Homes or check out the ruthless rhymes web page) were written by Col D Streamer, pen name of Harry Graham. These were published in the early 1900s at a time when dark and sinister humour was prevalent in the pages of published works. Graham is also the name most commonly associated with the poetry phenomena of Little Willies. Little Willies are poems that catalogue the dark catastrophes and grim activities surrounding the eponymous Little Willie.

Little Willie from his mirror
Sucked the mercury all off,
Thinking, in his childish error,
It would cure his whooping-cough.

At the funeral, Willie’s mother
Smartly said to Mrs. Brown,
”T was a chilly day for William
When the mercury went down.”

Samuel Reynolds Hole
A Little Tour in America

Poetry pages soon became replete with Little Willies, produced by a broad variety of authors and written to varying degrees of success. These set a precedent that paved the way for the line drawings and memorable couplets of Edward Gorey with works such as his delightfully deviant Gashlycrumb Tinies.

A is for Amy who fell down the stairs
B is for Basil assaulted by bears…

Edward Gorey
Gashlycrumb Tinies

What does any of this have to do with writing erotica? Well, that’s your exercise for this month. Produce quatrains or couplets that are delightfully deviant. Write something that blunders into rhyme and tells a cold and brutal story in the shortest and most simplistic manner. Dare to be vulgar and write something about little willies.

They climbed the hilltop just to have sex
Did the nursery rhyme Jackie and Jilly
But she pushed him down and made him her ex
Disappointed by his little willy.

I won’t write any more here this month. I’ll simply end by asking you to share your little willies in the comments box below.

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – the minute poem

August 4, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

The Minute Poem is a form that follows an 8, 4, 4, 4 syllable count structure. It usually has 3 stanzas that are exactly the same: 8, 4, 4, 4; 8, 4, 4, 4; 8, 4 , 4, 4 syllables.

A traditional Minute Poem has 12 lines in total. It is written in a strict iambic meter. The rhyme scheme is as follows: aabb, ccdd, eeff.

In this traditional example I’ve included both the rhyme scheme (aabb, ccdd, eeff) and the syllable count (8,4,4,4 for each stanza).

You come to me in saucy mood

You’re feeling rude

You want my dick

You want it quick

At first we cuddle, then we kiss

It feels like bliss

Our passions soar

We both want more

It’s all over too fast for you

What can I do?

Speed’s in my plan:

the minute man

Alternatively, there’s also a non-traditional minute poem. This adaptation doesn’t have to rhyme but it should follow the established syllable count.

Our naked bodies give shared warmth

they entertain

arouse, inspire

and so much more

We’ve been together for so long

It feels just like

eternity

but I want more

As long as our shared pleasures please

I’ll always try

to be with you

and give you more

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – the rhyme royal

July 25, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

James I of Scotland

The rhyme royal (sometimes called the rime royale by those who prefer to spell things incorrectly) is a fairly straightforward poetic form.

It refers to a stanza of seven lines, each line containing ten syllables, and the whole poem following a rhyming pattern of a b a b b c c. The form, according to the Poetry Foundation, was popularized by Geoffrey Chaucer and termed “royal” because his imitator, James I of Scotland, employed this structure in his own verse.

Here’s an example of one I wrote earlier.

We talk about our plans for this evening

Things we’d love to do when at our leisure

I long to give your sexual bells a ring:

Thrill you with a night you’ll always treasure.

In return you give a choice of pleasure

But I care not if you swallow or spit

I’m happy if you put your mouth round it.

Note that there are ten syllables per line. This isn’t iambic pentameter. This is merely ten syllables per line. Writing in iambs might make for something more profound but, as regular readers of these exercises will be aware, I am an exceptionally superficial poet.

One of the many fun things about this form is that the stanzas can be used to form verses in a longer poem. This is the way Chaucer used it in his work and we can see examples of this in Wyatt, Auden and many others.

I pluck your pubes from twixt my teeth and smile

The taste of you still lingers on my lips

Your scent’s a mem’ry that’s made to beguile

I yearn to squirm beneath your fingertips

And play with toys like canes and crops and whips

And savour pleasures borne beyond belief

Then pluck more pubes from in between my teeth

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html

Writing Exercise – the villanelle

July 18, 2015 by ashlister, posted in Uncategorized

The villanelle is a nineteen-line poetic form consisting of five tercets followed by a quatrain. There are two refrains and two repeating rhymes, with the first and third line of the first tercet repeated alternately until the last stanza, which includes both repeated lines.

This is a complex form – but it’s worth persevering.

The villanelle has been used for such memorable poems as Dylan Thomas’s ‘Do Not Go Gentle into that Goodnight’, Theodore Roethke’s ‘The Waking’ and Sylvia Plath’s ‘Mad Girl’s Love Song.’ Writing a villanelle is not easy but, once you’ve accomplished it, you’re in good company.

You may do me, and I will owe you one

Or until then I shall owe one to you

This lovers’ trade is really not a con

I guarantee it will be lots of fun

For me, at least (which might be nothing new)

You may do me, and I will owe you one

We shouldn’t start a sexu’l marathon

I know we’ve both got other things to do

This lovers’ trade is really not a con

But I’d like it if you could get me done

I don’t care if you suck or if we screw

You may do me, and I will owe you one

We’d celebrate with chilled Dom Perignon

I’ve brought a demi and champagne flutes: two

This lovers’ trade is really not a con

To get me off we’ll have to get it on

My need for satisfaction’s overdue

You may do me, and I will owe you one

This lovers’ trade is really not a con

There is a formula: A¹ b A² / a b A¹ / a b A² / a b A¹ / a b A² / a b A¹ A². Here the letters (a and b) indicate the two rhyme sounds. The use of upper case letters indicates a refrain. And the superscript numerals indicate the different use of refrain one and refrain two.

Would another example help to illustrate the form better?

You ask me if I’d like to be restrained	A¹
You think our love could flourish with me bound	b
You claim you want to see me being chained	A²

This interest in restraint is unexplained	a
And I think our relationship is sound	b
You ask me if I’d like to be restrained	A¹

You say I should be physically detained	a
Or tied up like some safe/secured hound	b
You claim you want to see me being chained	A²

I say, “Perhaps I might like being caned?”	a
Your eagerness does not get off the ground	b
You ask me if I’d like to be restrained	A¹

You say my problem is that I’m untrained	a
You bring out rope next time we fool around	b
You claim you want to see me being chained	A²

We tried it way back once and I complained	a
But with a gag I didn’t make a sound	b
You ask me if I’d like to be restrained	A¹
You claim you want to see me being chained	A²

The villanelle is a lot of fun to work with. It is a complex form but I figure those who’ve been reading these columns over the past year or so will be ready for the adventure of a greater challenge.

If you do want to submit to the current anthology, information can be found on: http://ashleylisterauthor.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/call-for-submissions-coming-together-in.html